(Follow this link to see the February 2022 Priory Newsletter where this appeared recently.)

– Rev. Master Margaret Clyde

This is a transcript of a Dharma talk given at Shasta Abbey in June 2021; it was recently published in the Journal of the Order of Buddhist Contemplatives and can be viewed on the OBC Journal website. Rev. Master Margaret trained for awhile at the Portland Buddhist Priory and is currently the prior at Shasta Abbey. The article is used with permission.

I’d like to welcome all of you whether you’re here in person or online. It would be nice to see everyone face to face – perhaps one day…

Today I’ll be talking about spiritual adulthood. The other day while walking to the meditation hall it occurred to me that, you know how children ask each other, “What do you want to be when you grow up?” – and that a six year-old would have said “I’m going to go sit alongside an active volcano and an interstate highway so I can learn to meditate and train myself for the benefit of all beings.” Can you imagine anyone saying that? But some of us grew up, we met someone who showed us the Truth – in my case, Rev. Master Jiyu-Kennett – and lo and behold here we are, sitting alongside a volcano, looking at a wall.

As it turned out, what I wanted to be when I grew up was a spiritual adult, and I’d like to talk today about what this means. Rev. Master Jiyu used to describe Buddhism as “a religion for spiritual adults,” and I’d often wonder – with anxiety – whether I’d ever “grow up” spiritually in the way she meant. I’d like to explore what spiritual adulthood means and how we can practice it. Notice that word, practice. Not how to have it or be it, but how to practice it.

So what is spiritual adulthood? Think about ordinary human adulthood. How do we recognize when someone has become an adult? There are certain signs: the person has reached their full growth; maybe they’ve finished their education; they’re no longer dependent on Mom and Dad but provide for their own livelihood; perhaps they’ve even started a new family. There are milestone ages: eighteen and twenty-one, when the person has certain legal and social rights granted only to adults.

But what about spiritual adulthood – are there any signs by which we realize that a person has reached spiritual adulthood? Is spiritual adulthood a “stage of life” that once reached is permanent; or rather is it an attitude of mind that includes certain qualities of temperament and modes of conduct. I lean toward the latter view. As I see it, the emergence of this mature attitude of mind is what characterizes a person as a spiritual adult. Rev. Master Jiyu was a spiritual adult. She left home and went to Asia in search of Truth; she found what she knew to be True; she then devoted her life to sharing that Truth with others. She knew who she was and what needed to be done, and she did it.

Rev. Master Jiyu was an extraordinary human being. However, the qualities that form the attitude of mind of a spiritual adult are available to all of us. Two of the qualities of this mind are responsibility and self-reliance. I’ll look at each of these with some examples and explanation.

First, responsibility: This to my mind is the primary attribute of a spiritual adult.

In Rev. Master Jiyu’s words, “Buddhism teaches responsibility: you are responsible for you; you are responsible for everything you do; there is nobody who is going to take the fall for you. You have to be an adult, you have to be responsible.”

The word responsible means a few things, including: “able to answer for one’s conduct and obligations.” Rev. Master Jiyu’s teaching on spiritual adulthood in Roar of the Tigress centers on the importance of knowing that our actions carry consequences: helpful actions bring positive consequences or merit; harmful actions bring suffering. This is due to karma, the law of the universe governing moral cause and effect. The law of karma is so profound that only a Buddha can understand it completely, so don’t worry if you find it puzzling. Ordinary daily life shows us how it works – take a moment and think of a time when you’ve done something helpful, and recall the positive feeling that came from it. Or think of a time when you acted in haste or anger, and recall the remorse you felt or may still feel.

Rev. Master Jiyu often advised us to “do your own training.” Part of the meaning of this is not to worry about what other people do, but to take extraordinary care of what we ourselves do. This sounds obvious – is obvious – but just look at the news or go to a cafe for a while and observe. Can you catch yourself caught in thoughts of what the governor or president should do or what was that woman thinking when she put on that purple-and-chartreuse polka-dot shirt?

Doing your own training doesn’t suggest standing by, observing from a window while someone in the street below is being mugged and not calling the police because it’s none of your business. It means that each of us is responsible for cleaning up our own mess, not that we should never offer help.

So, what to do when something isn’t right. Anything – injustice, abuse, a slight from a co-worker – that strikes you as wrong. Another meaning of the word, “responsible” is the ability to choose for oneself between right and wrong. The scripture Rules for Meditation instructs us to “think of neither good nor evil, consider neither right nor wrong.” This means not using the judgmental mind – the mind that judges harshly – to determine right or wrong. Instead, from the stillness of the mind of meditation, we use wise discernment to know for ourselves – to be responsible for – ceasing from evil, doing only good and doing good for others. Rev. Master Jiyu taught that being a Buddhist doesn’t imply being a “doormat” as she put it. When the feeling of something being wrong arises, instead of reacting we can stop for a moment and consider whether it is good to respond in some way; and if so, what response would be helpful. Is it in keeping with the Precepts? Does it help the situation or those involved? Will it cause suffering or remorse?

Blame is a habit of mind that doesn’t contribute to spiritual adulthood. Blame is in fact an obstacle to spiritual development, as it stands in the way of seeing what we need to do about ourselves. As Rev. Master Jiyu taught, “you made the mess of you; you have to clean it up.” This isn’t in any way a putdown – everyone has a mess to clean up and the ability to do it. Here’s an example of blame: I have a younger brother and when we were children he knew well – in the way of younger brothers – how to tease me to the end of my tether and beyond; and, sometimes I’d react with a kick or a slap. When the consequence would come in the form of a reprimand from Mom, I had a habitual answer: But he made me do it! I truly believed that he was the one responsible for my anger and my action. This is child-mind. The focus on my brother’s wrong action blocked the ability to feel remorse for having hit or kicked him. The remorse we feel from doing harmful acts can serve to block future impulses to repeat them, helping us to respond rather than react in the future. When we cast blame, it obstructs our ability to feel that remorse and see what I need to do about myself.

A story from the Dhammapada concerning a jealous teacher and a female lay disciple illustrates the Buddha’s teaching on blame:

At one time, there was a certain female lay disciple of a naked ascetic teacher named Pathika (naked asceticism was one of the practices done by ascetics at the Buddha’s time). This woman began to hear her neighbors describing the wonderful teachings of the Buddha, and desired to hear him preach the Dharma herself. Repeatedly she asked Pathika, “May I go to hear the Buddha speak,” and each time he replied that she was not to do it. Finally she was able to have her son invite the Buddha to their home. The son, however, reported this to Pathika. The next morning early, Patikha and the son hid in a back room of the house. The Buddha arrived in due time to receive dana (alms) and to offer teaching. When Pathika heard his female disciple praise the Buddha, he burst into the room saying “Hag, you are lost for applauding this man thus.” After reviling both the Buddha and the lay disciple, he then ran off.

The lay disciple became so embarrassed by her former teacher’s conduct that her mind became distracted and she was unable to give her attention to the Buddha’s teaching. The Buddha then instructed her in the following verse:

Let not one seek others’ faults, things left done and undone by them;
But consider one’s own deeds done and undone.

Another translation goes:

Dwell not on the faults and shortcomings of others;
Instead seek clarity about your own.

Clearly the jealous teacher was in the wrong and yet, as the Buddha pointed out, the woman too was wrong to focus on another’s misconduct, removing her attention from her own. She was reacting rather than responding.

Then there is the other main aspect of spiritual adulthood – I’d say it’s a sub-heading of responsibility – is self-reliance. A point of caution here: the term “self-reliance” means reliance upon the True Self, Buddha Nature. It doesn’t mean rugged individualism. It doesn’t mean one can do whatever one wants without regard to consequence. Buddhists take Refuge in Buddha, Dharma and Sangha. Buddha is Great Truth that permeates the Universe; Dharma is the teaching that expresses that Truth; Sangha is those who practice that Truth. In order to practice reliance on the True Self, I strongly recommend commitment to a steady meditation practice and the Precepts in order to help us hear the still, small voice of Truth.

Continuing to consider self-reliance I’d like to begin by reading a verse from Great Master Tōzan Ryōkai:

Truly I should not seek for the TRUTH from others
For then it will be far from me;
Now I am going alone,
Everywhere I am able to meet HIM.
HE is ME now,
I am not HIM;
When we understand this,
We are instantaneously with the TRUTH.

This verse points to the “self” that is meant in mature spiritual self-reliance. It is the True Self, True Nature, Buddha Nature, Lord of the House or whatever you choose to call it. This isn’t our self-centered self or child-mind that sits at the center of the universe knowing everything and wanting things its own way.

We seek for the TRUTH from others out of ignorance – ignorance of the fact that we already have or indeed are what we’re seeking. Instead of recognizing and expressing our True Nature, we create a duality between self and others, thinking they have something that we lack and that we can get it from them. If only I read the right book, listen to the right Dharma talk, follow the right diet… After banging our head against this wall for some time, with any luck we stop to see if there might be some other way.

HE is ME describes surrender of the selfish self to Something greater, the recognition that Something greater is in charge and the willingness to follow It. What Great Master Dōgen has called “dropping off of body and mind.” And even while yielding the individual self-centered “me” to that Something, I am not IT. I’m still me and not me at the same time, and if that seems contradictory, remember, we can understand in the mind of meditation. As Rev. Master would say, “I am not God, and there is nothing in me that is not of God.” There’s no separation. And the minute I start seeking again, there’s the ‘small self’ thinking that it lacks something and that it’s in charge, and once again I have to give it up. Although this momentary surrender of the ‘small self’ isn’t a “happily ever after” finish – what is ever finished??? – it opens a door through which we can catch a glimpse of the Infinite, and each glimpse serves to bring us toward the cessation of suffering, the bliss of Nirvana.

Another aspect of self-reliance is contained in a teaching of Shakyamuni Buddha to the Kalamas. These were people who lived on a busy trade route – as we at Shasta do – which brought many religious teachers to their door, each offering their own religious views. This confused the Kalamas. Not knowing which teaching to follow, they asked the Buddha for his advice. This was his teaching to them:

Do not go upon what has been acquired by repeated hearing; nor upon tradition; nor upon rumor; nor upon what is in a scripture; nor upon surmise; nor upon an axiom; nor upon specious reasoning; nor upon a bias towards a notion that has been pondered over; nor upon another’s seeming ability; nor upon the consideration, ‘The monk is our teacher.’ Kalamas, when you yourselves know: ‘These things are good; these things are not blameable; these things are praised by the wise; undertaken and observed, these things lead to benefit and happiness,’ enter on and abide in them.

And that goes back to that definition of responsibility, the ability to know for oneself what is right and what is wrong.

And those are some teachings and reflections on spiritual adulthood. May you find them helpful in your own lives.

Homage to the Buddha,
Homage to the Dharma,
Homage to the Sangha.